Friday, June 24, 2005

Lori and the Ugly Ghan

I spoke to her yesterday and she is very depressed. They found a kink in her intestine, but want to wait it out and she wants surgery to fix it NOW. Apparently it is causing tremendous pain and she cannot handle solid food.

They sent her home twice and both times she ended up back in the hospital within eight hours due to excrutiating pain and discomfort. Oral pain pills were not cutting it. She also had profuse vomiting and couldn't keep her meds down.

The asshole surgeon (appropriate, no) feels, in his opinion, that she shouldn't be in pain and that she should see a psychologist for her obvious depression. Now, has he had this type of surgery on himself???? Would he not be in a state of depression if he had a six hour surgery that wasn't working properly, was vomiting and in severe pain? He's an asshole and a jerk-off period. Lori has had it, but is basically stuck because no one will do surgery on anyone that has just had surgery from another surgeon; it's a good ole boy network and surgeons think they are God and should be bowed to.

I feel for her and wish I could help her. We discussed things yesterday and decided her husband had to be her advocate and start screaming to the hospital board. I'll call her today and see how things are, but I doubt much will have changed from yesterday.

Anyway, Lori, not being a comfortghan type of gal, made it a point to tell me that in no way, shape or form did she want a comfortghan. It was her worst nightmare. So, about a month ago, a group of us got together and made her the "Comfortghan from Hell". It is the ugliest mini ghan you have ever seen-lots of hideous colors, wonky squares and funky textures. I have to say, the ugliest and creepiest square award goes to Natalie with her brown nipple square.

Lori saw the ghan quickly and then was rushed back in the hospital, her husband John will bring it to the hospital for further inspection tomorrow. She was laughing about it and loved/hated the orange trim around the whole thing. She said all she needs to do now is take it to the home of a heavy smoker and leave it there for a year. Apparently, for some unknown reason, Red Heart Yarn manages to absorb twice the smell of cigarette smoke their competitors do (I don't think they advertise this as a selling point). She wants it good and smoky smelling and then in a year can hang it (yes, it had a dowel holder too) and truly get the 70's kinda of feel from it.

In any event, I learned a few things from this:

1) Everybody, across the entire country, has RH Mexicana scraps. This is a scary thought.
2) The gals and guy who helped with this are totally cool, totally wonderful and the best. They had a wonderful sense of humor with the whole thing and weren't insulted by the request : Send my your ugliest, funkiest, wonkiest 4" squares. They rose to the task with such zeal!

Thanks to: Regina, who is a true artist hands down, who made the loopy squares, which totally gave the ghan a look all it's own!

Drew, aka The Crochet Dude, who makes the most beautiful squares for comfortghans I have ever seen. He thinks his were very ugly, but I don't think he could make an ugly square blindfolded.

Kari, who rushed to get done the fluorescent green and orange squares before a much needed vacation.

Ro, who, in spite of feeling so wonky herself, managed to eke out a few wonkies all her own.

And Natalie, who truly took the term "ugliest" to heart. Never in my life, have I seen such ugly squares. The brown nipple one does bear mentioning again because it truly gave me the creeps. When my husband saw it, he asked it I was going to attach a stray hair to it to make it truly realistic (apparently he's seen breasts that have a hair, not mine, but this seems to have been burned into his brain).

You guys are awesome and I can't thank you enough for being part of this.

Now, without further adieu:

The Ugly Ghan from Hell!!!!And yes, it's clickable!!!!


Natalie said...

Woo-Hoo! i got the ugliest square award, LOL! Really, I'm just glad it brought a smile to Lori, I had fun working on it. I hope things start looking up soon for her.

noricum said...

Man, that is one awesome ugly-ghan!

Faith said...

That is hysterical! I love it!

Amanda said...

What a great idea!! I'm kicking myself in the butt for not mailing out my squares in know how things have been lately. Give my best to Lori, I've been thinking of her a lot lately. I thought she went with a surgeon that she liked...has he become a dick or is this a different one?

ladylinoleum said...

I was honored to participate! I am working on another commission for Lori too...just you wait to see that one! Anyway, I totally agree that it needs cig odor. Funny.

Hey, I have two skeins of RH Mexicana at home...a staple in my stash. Agreed, very scary.

Stacey said...

That ghan is a hoot!

Agh, I just wanted to throttle that surgeon reading your post. I've seen that happen to someone before, where the person was depressed about medical problems and the doctors then wanted to refuse any treatment but psychiatric, and it's just wrong, wrong, wrong.

Sara said...

truly hideous.

Wendy said...

Only a true friend would be so generous to make such a hideous thing! Love it!

Melissa said...

That ugly-ghan is a 70s, ugly sort of way...

I hope Lori can find a different doc or someone kickstarts her current one into gear.

Nancy said...

I hate, hate, HATE! surgeons who presume that if a woman is feeling pain, it must all be "in her head" and fixable by drugging the fertilizer out of her. Had a neurologist try that with me. The second doc I went to ordered the correct MRI, discovered my spinal chord was being pinched by some extra bone I WAS BORN WITH.. that had gotten thicker (0h, ain't it fun to get older) and was in danger of causing me to be paralyzed, amoung other nice little problems. He ordered surgery as fast as I could get my world in order.

Pain: much better. NO MORE BRAIN MEDS!

Tell her to go to another doc, and another, till she finds one that takes her seriously. They are out there!

Jewels said...

ewwwwwh, the colors are perfectly hideous! Looks kinda like my grade 7 wardrobe did, hehe

jess said...

that's the best uglyghan ever! I love (hate?) it! ha!

~drew emborsky~ said...

Ugly indeed!!! Mission accomplished!!

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